The power of “yet” and “and”

30/10/2024

As educators and parents, we want our children and young people to adopt a growth mindset.

Growth mindset” is a term coined by psychologist Carol Dweck, and it refers to a set of underlying beliefs about learning, success, and ability that view setbacks and mistakes as opportunities to learn, not a sign that you’ll always be the same. People with a growth mindset see intelligence and achievement as things that can be developed. The opposite viewpoint is a “fixed mindset”, which believes that intelligence, abilities, and talents are inherently stable and unchangeable over time. Sounds pretty important for helping our children develop resilience, remain curious, and give things a go, doesn’t it?

A growth mindset relates to Pause Breathe Smile mindfulness practices because by practicing mindfulness, we focus on what is happening right here and now, rather than give into rumination (stories about things that have already happened) or worry (stories about what might happen).

Our Lesson 5 content “The Neurons that Fire Together Wire Together” points out, that the thoughts we practice become engrained and can become our unquestioned beliefs. Things like “I’m not good at maths” or “I’ll never be able to make friends” or “This is too hard” all are thoughts that, with practice, we can learn to notice and change, instead of just believing them.

Sometimes just one word can begin to change the unhelpful thought. For example, the word “yet” is a powerful reframe that’s only three letters long. There’s a difference between the thought, “I’m not good at multiplication” and “I’m not good at multiplication yet.” “And” is another powerful word that can help our ākonga (and us!) hold two things to be true at once. For example, “Today I forgot some of the words in kapa haka, and I know I’m still a valuable member of the team” or “I haven’t made a new friend yet, and tomorrow I’m going to try again.”

Growth mindset is not about pretending things are great when they aren’t, nor is it about praising children or falsely inflating statements about their strengths or achievements. Growth mindset is simply a more curious, open, engaged, and honest way of looking at how people grow, change, learn, and mature. When we can see mistakes and ‘failures’ as just one part of the journey, we can open ourselves up to taking risks, having fun, and developing those skills, rather than thinking we are static. And becoming more mindful of what thoughts are running in the background is a key way to rewire our thinking to grow.